1. |
Cringe (feat. ???)
02:51
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[Verse 1: Glarthir]
Late in the evening, walking down the street
Making very little noise with my shaking feet
Turn around the corner and guess what I see
I see a drawing on the sign that looks like me
“Skingrad city murderer still at large,
Used a soul gem, caught a different charge”
Now, why would someone draw me on a wanted sign?
Prison bars are something I can’t get behind
[Chorus: Imperial Guard & Glarthir]
Stop right there, boy, you’re acting cringe
Don’t you dare move a muscle by a single inch
Now pay the court a fine or it’s off to jail
Your stolen goods are forfeit
Wait, wait, listen
[Verse 2: Glarthir]
Hold your horses, officer, I can explain
Poor Glarthir’s being framed for someone’s personal gain
There’s a woman ‘round these parts and her name’s Bernadette
I’m afraid she’s the kind of witch to long for my death
Toutius Sextius is sexting my wife
I am sure that motherfucker wants me out of his life
Not to toot my own horns but I know who is sus
In the city of Sin-grad, you don’t know who to trust
[Chorus: Imperial Guard/Sheogorath]
Stop right there, boy, you’re acting cringe
Don’t you dare move a muscle by a single inch
Now pay the court a fine or it’s off to jail
Your stolen goods are forfeit and your psyche is frail
[Verse 3: Sheogorath]
Shawty so fine she gotta stop right there
Take this criminal’s cum with that delicate pair
I do apologize, brother, I got distracted by breasts
Now, where’s my fella Haskill, time to welcome our guest
Fatherless broad, she call me papa
Blowing Lil Sheo like my name is zaza
Got Duolingo, started learning thot, so
Lil Sheo is a pretty motherfucker
I took her home and she wet my willy
Dementia McDonald's, the beef is silly
Lil ass boy, you’re going crazy
Lil ass boy, you’re coming with me
[Outro: Glarthir]
Yeah! Woohoo! Wait. You- you're kind of weird, you know that? But that's okay! I... I like crazy people!
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2. |
3 Septims
03:13
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[Verse 1:]
I’m just an average Bosmer boy
Not a septim to my name
My awful bed is full of bugs
I cannot talk a good game
My father never made lots of coin
Never brought me up to speed
But I still get high on skooma, so
Let me tell you what I need
I need
[Chorus:]
20 schmackaroos, 3 septims
2 Cyrodiilic dollars, baby [x3]
20 schmackaroos, 3 septims
2 Cyrodiilic dollars
[Verse 2:]
I sought out different mages
And I told them that I’m poor
One said he’d make my money longer
Than the Vampire cure
“Oh, please, come on now, make me rich,”
I begged with no delay
He told me it comes with a price
I’m not prepared to pay
He gave me
[Chorus:]
[Verse 3:]
I made fast friends with shiny coin
Oh yeah, baby, I’m rich
So rich that even my cheese is breaded
Mozzarella sticks
Big house in Skingrad, pretty girl
And she wants some Bosmer kids
Stuck my Muatra in her CHIMney
And gave her a little kiss
But I can never stop the feeling
Every time she grabs my crotch
I look over my shoulder
And I feel I’m being watched
I feel that she is after me
I feel that she’s a threat
I feel the need to get rid of her
Cause she can never get my
[Chorus:]
[Outro:]
I'm loaded with gold!
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3. |
Watch Out!!!
02:56
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[Verse 1:]
Hey! Hey there, brother mer
If you want to live, you must heed my words
Skingrad likes to watch us both
Like a cute little bosmer Netchflix show
Wake up in the morning, that’s terrific
But beware, the dawn might be mythic
You might die in the local pub
At the bottle of flin, it’s a coroner club
[Chorus:]
So watch out
You will end up just as I thought
Just as I thought
Friend, you better watch out
You will end up just as I thought
Just as I thought
Just as I thought
[Verse 2:]
Don’t let Salmo get his bread
Or he might be rich but we’ll all be dead
Talk to Dorian in Talos Plaza
He knows how to get ahead
Scamps, Dremora, Watchers, Seekers
Hiss at you from your music speakers
But it has to be understood
That your speakers might be from the Brotherhood!
[Chorus:]
[Verse 3:]
Daedric entities, big and small
Patiently wait for the Towers’ fall
Some of them down like a game of Jenga
Nirn is a playground to them all
Dunmer, count the days that pass
You’ve got a disaster on your ass
Don’t succumb to the sense of dread
You fucks will be truly seeing red
[Chorus:]
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4. |
Poison (feat. Weebam-Na)
02:47
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[Verse 1: Glarthir]
I’m a Wood Elf, the “I wish a bitch would” Elf
“Do it better than you bitches ever could” Elf
Stupid rich, you can call me Hollywood Elf
Call the shots, you should know you won’t be missed, boy
Catwalk got your panties in a twist, boy
Time to reacquaint your face with my fist, boy
On your deathbed Arkay will come quick, boy
[Chorus: Glarthir]
I can smell it on your breath, you’re talking shit
I’m gonna put some fucking poison on your lips
Your elixir’s ready, filthy little bitch
How I sorely wish that you did not exist
[Verse 2: Glarthir]
Hmm, let’s see what I need
2 tomatoes, a big block of cheese
Loaf of bread, some meat and some fish
Wait, that’s my food shopping list
Call the shots, you should know you won’t be missed, boy
Catwalk got your panties in a twist, boy
Gonna choke when the secret sauces hit, boy
On your deathbed Arkay will come quick, boy
[Chorus: Glarthir & Weebam-Na]
I can smell it on your breath, you’re talking shit
I’m gonna put some fucking poison on your lips
Your elixir’s ready, filthy little bitch
Wait, you forgot the most important bit
Pow- pow- pow- pow- powdered deer
Pow- pow- powdered deer penis [x2]
[Verse 3: Weebam-Na]
There’s a reason that your mother calls me lip gloss
If you want beef, I’ll serve it with some cream sauce
Be careful, this swag is not for sale
Check your balance, you might want to tip the scales
We self-served cause we also ate, boy
Top G, we not talking lowercase, boy
Kiss you on the mouth if you think we straight, boy
Deer penis ain’t the only thing you’ll taste, boy
[Chorus: Glarthir & Weebam-Na]
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5. |
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[Intro: Glarthir]
I’m guessing you’re angling for an invitation to one of my super parties…
[Chorus: Nels the Naughty, Dovesi Dran, Neville & Matilde Petit]
Get your freak on [x8]
[Verse 1: Nels the Naughty]
This tavern wench is pretty
I’m touching on her titty
She’s playing with my dong
Till the situation’s sticky
This Glarthir dude just met us
We’d party if he let us
He thinks there’s something wrong
An assassin’s out to get us
[Chorus:]
[Verse 2: Matilde Petit & Glarthir]
Listen closely, I am told
That someone hid a pot of gold
So this might be my precious chance
To get some better chest implants
We all will die here, don’t you see?
Now listen, I might be Petit
And you’re so short, but by the stars
You’re still a damn pain in my arse
[Chorus:]
[Verse 3: Dovesi Dran]
(Oh, that little Dark Elf harlot!)
Primo! Oh, Primo! (Are you insane?)
Oh my love!
I love him dearly! (Come on!)
Oh, Primo! Oh, Primo!
Oh my love!
I love him dearly!
[Bridge: Neville]
Anyway
Now everybody get down and dance
Get down and feel the beat!
Now everybody get down and dance
Get down, turn up the heat! [x2]
Buss it
[Chorus:]
[Outro: Neville & Glarthir]
I was wondering when you’d get to me
They gave me no choice! I’m not a violent person, but I can only be pushed so far!
Those watching eyes! Always watching me, but never again! I’m free!
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